Envy

It began as an adolescent: I envied her popularity. I envied the magnificence of her giant bangs. I envied the ease of her flirtation with boys. I envied the way she wore her Z Cavariccis. I envied her athleticism, her tanned skin, her confidence, her status. I looked around at the girls who were my peers and I measured myself against them. In my mind, I always fell short. I turned the negative energy of envy inward, silently berating myself. Continue reading Envy

Into the Darkness

I walked with my friend into her darkness yesterday. She is in the midst of raw pain from a new divorce; lonely, shaken, exposed, angry, wild, and new. She was breaking loose from years in shackles. She needed to at once curl into her tenderized soul and nurse the open wounds of failed dreams and yet spread her wings in the updraft of full abandonment.  I followed her into the darkness like a cautious … Continue reading Into the Darkness

#metoo

All of our stories are different, and many are much more traumatic than mine, but they all hold something in common: that horrible underlying fear that we are ultimately not in control of what happens to our bodies. That feeling that as women we will always have to step back and relinquish our power… Which lets us justify our self-destructive acts that purposefully turn down the pilot light in our bellies, and let us walk away from the Force we hold within ourselves, giving it up for lost. Continue reading #metoo